Different ages, different stages...different kinds of immigrants
All immigrants don't come off the same boat-literally and figuratively. One's expectations of America, one's understanding of the differences between here and 'there', one's level of assimilation have much to do with one major factor: how old they were when they arrived here.
One boat brings the babies-children who are so young that their memories of the 'Old Country' are basically nothing after just a short while. These are children who still go to elementary school here, at least for a couple of years, and learn to speak fluently in a matter of months. They translate television shows and movies for their parents, and loose any accent in their speech by high-school. They grow up in complete immersion of this culture-the good, the bad and the ugly of it all. They are Americans, absorbed and assimilated, and you'd never know they weren't born here unless you heard them speak their mother tongue with others. They hear stories about the old country during their upbringing, and they are pushed to 'have it better than we did' by their parents, but they can't relate to the difference because they don't remember.
The next boat brings the children who are about 10 to 16 years old. These immigrant have strong cultural and emotional ties to the 'Old Country' that is a foundation that will never be forgotten. They have relatives and friends they left there that they do remember and miss in a way the babies don't.
They went to school, and absorbed customs and habits and have started forming opinions about their environment. They come here, old enough to make some of their own choices-what to wear, who to be friends with. And as they learn to speak in a hurry, they adapt mostly the same way the babies did-not just understanding the literal meaning of words and phrases as well as the connotation and cultural relativity-but able to reproduce them and use them with a fluency that lets these immigrant join our society as adults who seem very assimilated indeed. The transition may not be as smooth as it was for the ever immersed babe however, since being a teenager brings lots of self-criticism and self-doubt in every language and every country. Getting used to new customs while trying to control your hormones and please your parents all at the same time can be stressful. But they do grow into adult Americans you will most likely recognize as someone who was not born here. There is just something about them, a slight accent maybe, or a holiday tradition that's not part of your norm, or a favorite food their mom keeps making and you keep eating as you try to make out just what language they are speaking together.
These immigrants, like their baby siblings, are almost guaranteed to 'do better' than their parent. They will grow up being constantly reminded of their improved chances to succeed as an individual, of the sacrifices their elders made so they could have 'a better life'. That's right, 'guilt' them right into it.
The third boat brings the parents of these first two boatloads. These 20-ish to 50-ish aged immigrants come here with a different sense of 'a new place to live' than their children do. They bring with them established life experience-of working, paying taxes, unfair persecution and supressed opinions. And there is great pressure on them, pressure to establish themselves as people and live the dream they searched for, to provide for their families, to absorb custom and culture, and of course to learn to speak English. And here is one obstacle for some of them, since the older we get, the harder it gets to learn a new language.
Many of these hard working Americans will speak with poor grammar and pronunciation, and many will not have the time to immerse themselves in the study of assimilation-all the media, music, movies, tv-shows and even American historical facts that all relate to our culture. They are the ones that you may have to explain a joke to even after they've been here 10 years because they don't get the 'long face' of the horse in the bar, or don't know who Sponge Bob Square Pants is. But they do know that their children have a better chance to make themselves a productive life than they did back in the 'Old Country". Some are somewhat disillusioned at all the restrictions imposed on our supposed freedoms-from business regulations to airport screenings-but most are glad to pay the price, for the reward is vested in the future generation. In the hope that somehow it will be better for them, our children, that they can change it to the way it should be. Ah, the way it should be would be great, but it's still better than where they came from for most of them. They have real life "Before I came to America" to compare it to, and that's what keeps them going even after their dream bubbles have burst.
The last figurative boat to dock brings immingrants over 50 years of age. They come mostly out of necessity, because they are brought as part of a family who could not or would not leave them in their already established and very lived lives back in the 'Old Country'. They are grandmothers who babysit newborns or stay with you after school and cook dinner before your parents get home from work. They are grandfathers who curse at the soccer match on television in a foreign language you do understand. They learn very little or no english, and they have a hard time understanding and using the technology of today. Why, they can remember sitting in the 'outhouse' during their childhood. They may cling to old traditions and grapple with new ones. (No, mom, you can't clip real candles on the Christmas tree) But these grandparent aged immigrants hold many families anchored as the younger generation works, and are a rich source of family heritage. They also know the lessons taught about truth, honesty and respect from real life and can use these values to enhance their American experience-and everone else's.
These are the fresh ingredients in our giant Melting Pot, delivered to our doorstep every day curtesy of governments that opress, abuse, deny, ignore, persecute, murder, cheat, imprison or just generally disgust their citizens on a regular basis. I hope the soup comes out good, I brought some of the stones.
One boat brings the babies-children who are so young that their memories of the 'Old Country' are basically nothing after just a short while. These are children who still go to elementary school here, at least for a couple of years, and learn to speak fluently in a matter of months. They translate television shows and movies for their parents, and loose any accent in their speech by high-school. They grow up in complete immersion of this culture-the good, the bad and the ugly of it all. They are Americans, absorbed and assimilated, and you'd never know they weren't born here unless you heard them speak their mother tongue with others. They hear stories about the old country during their upbringing, and they are pushed to 'have it better than we did' by their parents, but they can't relate to the difference because they don't remember.
The next boat brings the children who are about 10 to 16 years old. These immigrant have strong cultural and emotional ties to the 'Old Country' that is a foundation that will never be forgotten. They have relatives and friends they left there that they do remember and miss in a way the babies don't.
They went to school, and absorbed customs and habits and have started forming opinions about their environment. They come here, old enough to make some of their own choices-what to wear, who to be friends with. And as they learn to speak in a hurry, they adapt mostly the same way the babies did-not just understanding the literal meaning of words and phrases as well as the connotation and cultural relativity-but able to reproduce them and use them with a fluency that lets these immigrant join our society as adults who seem very assimilated indeed. The transition may not be as smooth as it was for the ever immersed babe however, since being a teenager brings lots of self-criticism and self-doubt in every language and every country. Getting used to new customs while trying to control your hormones and please your parents all at the same time can be stressful. But they do grow into adult Americans you will most likely recognize as someone who was not born here. There is just something about them, a slight accent maybe, or a holiday tradition that's not part of your norm, or a favorite food their mom keeps making and you keep eating as you try to make out just what language they are speaking together.
These immigrants, like their baby siblings, are almost guaranteed to 'do better' than their parent. They will grow up being constantly reminded of their improved chances to succeed as an individual, of the sacrifices their elders made so they could have 'a better life'. That's right, 'guilt' them right into it.
The third boat brings the parents of these first two boatloads. These 20-ish to 50-ish aged immigrants come here with a different sense of 'a new place to live' than their children do. They bring with them established life experience-of working, paying taxes, unfair persecution and supressed opinions. And there is great pressure on them, pressure to establish themselves as people and live the dream they searched for, to provide for their families, to absorb custom and culture, and of course to learn to speak English. And here is one obstacle for some of them, since the older we get, the harder it gets to learn a new language.
Many of these hard working Americans will speak with poor grammar and pronunciation, and many will not have the time to immerse themselves in the study of assimilation-all the media, music, movies, tv-shows and even American historical facts that all relate to our culture. They are the ones that you may have to explain a joke to even after they've been here 10 years because they don't get the 'long face' of the horse in the bar, or don't know who Sponge Bob Square Pants is. But they do know that their children have a better chance to make themselves a productive life than they did back in the 'Old Country". Some are somewhat disillusioned at all the restrictions imposed on our supposed freedoms-from business regulations to airport screenings-but most are glad to pay the price, for the reward is vested in the future generation. In the hope that somehow it will be better for them, our children, that they can change it to the way it should be. Ah, the way it should be would be great, but it's still better than where they came from for most of them. They have real life "Before I came to America" to compare it to, and that's what keeps them going even after their dream bubbles have burst.
The last figurative boat to dock brings immingrants over 50 years of age. They come mostly out of necessity, because they are brought as part of a family who could not or would not leave them in their already established and very lived lives back in the 'Old Country'. They are grandmothers who babysit newborns or stay with you after school and cook dinner before your parents get home from work. They are grandfathers who curse at the soccer match on television in a foreign language you do understand. They learn very little or no english, and they have a hard time understanding and using the technology of today. Why, they can remember sitting in the 'outhouse' during their childhood. They may cling to old traditions and grapple with new ones. (No, mom, you can't clip real candles on the Christmas tree) But these grandparent aged immigrants hold many families anchored as the younger generation works, and are a rich source of family heritage. They also know the lessons taught about truth, honesty and respect from real life and can use these values to enhance their American experience-and everone else's.
These are the fresh ingredients in our giant Melting Pot, delivered to our doorstep every day curtesy of governments that opress, abuse, deny, ignore, persecute, murder, cheat, imprison or just generally disgust their citizens on a regular basis. I hope the soup comes out good, I brought some of the stones.